December 15, 2025
A couple days ago, the Christmas tree was carried in the house and assembled, yes it's a fake tree. We were pleasantly surprised with this years' game of "what's living in the box", probably due to the early freeze we had this year. The ornament theme picked was simple, slightly monochromatic and keeping it simple, unlike previous years of every branch dripping with sparkling glass of every shape and size. This Grandma is feeling the years, and thoughts of taking it down by myself weighs in. I hate to admit, the ornament tote is still sitting open in the floor because my anxiety limits me. Almost like that too much coffee buzz that sends a dull ache sitting behind my right breast.
I have yet to do more decorating than the tree, but I have options. Trying to pull on possible images of joy from the grandkids, to make it worth the effort, and it's hard. I have to try to make the visit for the holidays more magical and special, just in case this is my last.
It's easier to make the lists of what has to be accomplished, than it is to actually do them. The cookie dough needs mixed and readied for baking. Ingredients for said cookies need to be obtained if I can't find them in the cabinets, though I do try to keep all the basics in stock. Presents need purchased, sigh, to do that I have to actually leave the house at this point, because you can't trust the mail these days. The meal needs planned. The group text needs sent to see who is actually coming for our Christmas Eve gathering. Then the compiling who is contributing what food to make the day feel like something special. My tradition has been to continue with my rendition Mom's chicken and dumplings, and some appetizers. We need some extra non-cookie options to keep us from passing out from the sugar rush. Then the endless cleaning, recleaning, that makes me feel less like a failure.
Smiling... :)
ReplyDeleteI never understood, much less appreciated, the work that goes into big gatherings of family and friends during the holidays. Now that I'm older and have contributed to several hosts, I get it and it's sometimes been both daunting and draining. However, that wonderful, oh-so-excellent feeling of having yet another opportunity to spend time together has always been worth it.
I can't not notice our ranks growing thinner as we gain ground in years. Several way too close to my age group, and some even younger. However, their absence generates a need to make the most of what time we have and be as much of a blessing as we can, while we can. :)
Excellent, thoughtful content!